HELLO, BLOG THING

   Pardon me if I seem new to all of this. It's because I am. New to all of this, that is. Until now all the internet meant to me was email and paying bills.

   That is until my sleep left me. Then I discovered this whole new world... wide web...

   I currently suffer from insomnia. Now for those of you who are unfamiliar with this particular malady, it doesn't mean I don't sleep, although I do have my share of those nights... but what it means is I follow irregular sleeping patterns - long hours of restless tossing and turning followed by short periods of unrestful sleep. Most nights I'm lucky if I pull more than an hour of uninterrupted sleep.

   So what is there for me to do in the wee small hours waiting for the Sandman to quit fucking around and put me out other than surf the web?

   So whatever. A friend of mine suggested doing one of these blog things, because reading and writing is supposed to make you sleepy... as if just being sleepy was all I needed. Whatever again, she has a nice ass, so I'll try it.

... If you're reading this, Steph, you can't get mad at me. It's late and I'm delirious... and you DO have a spectacular ass... I wanna be friends with it, as Ron Burgundy would say...

   I'm gonna shut up now.

   I doubt she's reading this...